Rational Brain; Rebellious Body理性的頭腦，反叛的身體

I learned how to in-line skate pretty much on my own: I bought a pair of in-line skates and I took them to the riverfront and skated. I was quite nervous the first two runs and almost ripped somebody’s top off when I followed him going downhill. Shortly after that I started to feel quite good on skates since I had no ambition on those 4-wheel things other than driving forward.

As a thunderstorm always comes in when you least expect it, God likes to pick a rough time to show you life is in fact cruel. I participated in one of the Landskaters’ Tuesday-night city skates and that was when my confidence faced one of the most severe challenges. I had a hard time following the skate and many times I was so close to being swept away by the sweeper.

Not until my husband taught me how to skate the correct way, did I realize I had been skating the “wrong” way. At first, I was resistant to his skating 101 and wanted to return to where I was. After all, I was happy there: skating forward along the riverfront; the cement was less bumpy than the pavement and the sunset was sweeter than street lights. There was nothing wrong to settle in there; it was just, for me, after the chrysalis is popped, there is no turning back.

Looking back, I have learned a few sports on my own, and only consult friends who are more experienced for advice. But if I am serious about a sport, at some point, I have an urge to take an instructional class, and I’m always surprised by how inefficient I was or even how “wrong” I was before the professional help: not only was I going nowhere, but sometimes I was moving in a bad direction.

Going nowhere is probably okay but going somewhere I shouldn’t be exposes me to injuries and costs me more effort to retreat. Now I start early: Before I deviate too far from the course, I seek an expert’s help or at least I study instructional books if my wallet needs help first. This approach works just fine but another dilemma presents itself.

I don’t know how most people learn a new sport: do they simply mimic what their instructors have demonstrated or before they buy into any concept do they have to make sure they completely understand every principle of motion?

I am smart, huh, at least I truly believe so and so does my mom. Before I turned to the page of learning sports, I had spent quite an amount of time on books, digesting theories, equations, you know, all that scientific stuff. I am analytical and I depend on my brain and post questions on virtually everything.

When I am learning a new sport, unless the instructor explains well why I have to do such and such, my not-yet-convinced brain refuses to cooperate and disables all my muscle groups. Unfortunately, my brain is not omnipotent: sometimes I sense that my instructor is right but a good explanation is beyond my brain’s reach; sometimes my brain interprets the instruction wrong; sometimes the brain is manipulated by fear or habits and delivers destructive commands.

If my brain is not ready to explain an instruction, I memorize it and hope some day I can explain it. How I learned to roll my kayak can be an example here. At the beginning, out of 10 attempts I could only make one successful roll. Of course I wanted to know what I did wrong, but sometimes even an experienced instructor can’t tell you exactly why, because most of the action is done under water.

I kept watching an instructional video over and over and memorized all the right things I needed to perform, and participated in a private lesson. After numerous tries, I realized how important the set-up position for a roll is. For a good roll, I need to use my torso to lift my body as close to the water surface as possible. By doing that not only the water resistance is reduced but also your paddle can float and generate a powerful push. Many people told me “your paddle sank too much” or “your head lifted too early,” but those were mistakes which naturally came from the first mistake: not using my torso to lift my upper body to the water surface. Once I could do it, I could analyze it. Sometimes things come in a reverse order from what you normally expect.

Let me use another example to demonstrate how my brain was poor in command. When I just started to climb, I learned that I want to maximize my leg usage and minimize arm usage. This makes perfect sense because legs are much stronger than arms. At that time I also picked up that it is much better to straighten the arms but I didn’t make any connection between those two concepts.

It happens so often that my arms give up so I have to stop climbing. My instructor said that I should have given more trust to my legs and shifted more weight to my legs. Instead, I tried to grab too hard on my handholds, and bent my elbows trying to use my arms to pull myself up. She made me do a little experiment: to hold two handholds about 2 meters from the ground, and just hang my whole body there, and then try to bend my elbows to lift my body upward. My arms changed their state from feeling nothing to being exhausted.

The same thing happened when my hand encountered a round and smooth handhold. The more I wanted to hold on to it tightly, the more incompetent I felt I was. My instructor taught me to straighten my arm and lean against the direction of the handhold. I therefore could stay where I was quite peacefully for a short moment and before my hand slipped off the handhold I had enough time to reach the next handhold.

Why my brain ordered my muscles to do the wrong movement still puzzles me. In fact, right now I still have the tendency to overuse my arms so I have to keep reminding myself to give my legs more faith, which they deserve.

Learning sports is hilarious. It is actually not that different from a scientific project. I used to be so proud of my rational brain and give much credit to my analytical approach. However, muscles have a way to tell the dominating brain that it is wrong or demonstrate a new territory where the brain hasn’t had a chance to explore yet.

I still like to analyze, but now I give my muscles more rope. Muscles can teach my brain a good lesson and my brain is still the one who connects all the dots. It is like a jigsaw puzzle. If you are stuck in one area and cannot make any progress, you shift your focus on another battlefield, and at the end all the sub projects will joint.

基本上，我是自己學習怎麼溜直排輪的。事情很簡單，買雙直排輪，拎到河邊，就希哩呼嚕開始滑起來。剛開始的時候是蠻緊張的，也差點滑到河裡，還快要把前方帶我滑下坡的人的上衣扯破才甘心。經過兩三次的調適，慢慢地就開始溜得挺順手了，心裡還頗得意，反正我的目的只不過是往前溜罷了，並不想要玩什麼花俏。

不過就像雷陣雨總是在沒帶傘的時候落下，上天總是找最好的時機，告訴我們現實總是殘酷的。一次，我參加費城Landskaters的活動，那是一個星期二晚上，我的自信心面臨極大的考驗。大家在費城馬路上溜得不亦樂乎，我在最後追得是有氣無力，好幾次，似乎最後的押隊者就要跟我說：「這位女施主，回頭是岸啊！」

不過我還是懵懵懂懂，直到老公節米教導我溜直排輪正確的姿勢，才晴天霹靂地發現，我的溜法相當的沒有效率。剛開始，我對學習正確的溜法還相當的抗拒，畢竟在我還沒有知道這些殘酷的事實之前，我是真的自得其樂地在河邊逍遙的溜我小天地中的直排輪。河邊道路可是比費城的街巷馬路來得平坦，夕陽餘暉也比街燈更是詩情畫意。只是，如同掙脫小蛹的蝴蝶，我，是沒有辦法回頭了。

回頭展眼來時路，很多運動都是自己摸索前進的，要不然，頂多就是問問比較有經驗的朋友們。但是如果我對某項運動開始認真了，令人徘徊的十字路口遲早會出現，也就是該找個老師的時候了。上課的心得，總是醍醐灌頂，覺今是而昨非。為什麼自己學習，不是在原地踏步，就是朝著不正確的方向走呢？

原地踏步如果還能自得其樂，也就罷了。怕的是，朝著錯誤的方向前進，可能會累積的運動傷害，更別說要費心費力糾正自己已經養成的錯誤習慣了。現在的我，盡我可能在墮入無間輪迴之前，早些開始接觸正確的運動方式。可能是花錢上課找專家級的幫助，但如果我的荷包更需要幫助，可能就先買本教科書自己研習。這樣的方法倒頗為實用，就是我的腦袋瓜和我的身體有時候協調不起來。

不知道大家都是怎麼學習新運動的？看著教練怎麼做，就跟著怎麼做？還是腦袋瓜必須先消化每個運動定律，手腳才跟著揮舞。

我是個聰明人，至少我是這麼虔誠地相信著，而我老爸老媽一定也是這麼認為。在我開啟學習運動的新頁之前，能做的事就是讀書，讀書讀書，反正萬般皆下品嘛！所以我學習、消化國英數理化，被訓練上科學分析的道路。變得喜好分析，遵從理性，事事懷疑。

有時候我這個個性可彆扭了，挑戰教練為什麼我們要這樣這樣做，是什麼道理，有什麼好處？腦袋瓜如果沒有分析出一個道理出來，很有可能就會下令肌肉罷工，搞得自己一點都不靈活。當然囉，腦袋瓜不一定萬能，有時候可以感覺教練說的明明是字字珠璣，偏偏腦袋瓜對於運動接觸層面還不夠廣，沒有辦法給一個令人滿意的解釋。有時候情況還更壞，腦袋給予教練的指示全新的定義，而有時候恐懼或是習慣會障礙腦袋的判斷力，給予身體肌肉錯誤的指令。

如果我的腦袋還沒有能力消化教練給的知識，我就硬記，等來日方長有機會去印證。當初令狐冲不也是這樣先記下獨孤九劍的口訣嗎？一個切身的例子是學習獨木舟的180度翻船（Eskimo Roll）。剛開始學習的時候，成功率超級低，成功了也搞不清楚到底怎麼回事。當然，心急的想知道的還是錯誤的嘗試到底是錯在哪裡？偏偏，有時候就算是有經驗的教練也不一定馬上可以告訴你錯在哪裡，因為這個動作很大的一部份是在水面下完成的。

那時候我持續播放友人借給我的教學錄影帶，還請教練給予個人指導。終於我才恍然大悟，翻船準備動作的重要性。要翻得好、翻得順，要先利用身體核心部分的肌肉，盡量將上半身舉到靠近水面的地方。這樣一來，翻轉時受到的水阻較少，槳也不會過沈以致於無法產生足夠的推力。很多人看我練習的時候，告訴我「妳的槳太沈了」或是「妳的頭太早抬起了」，這些都沒錯，可是這些錯誤都是因為第一個步驟沒有做好，所產生的連鎖反應。我知道準備動作很重要，但是我一直只做到一半的準備動作，直到我終於了解錄影帶中所說的「上半身靠近水面」的道理。有時候，先會做了才知道為什麼，不是總是先知道為什麼的。

可有時候，腦袋知道為什麼，偏偏就告訴身體其他的故事。以下發生在我上攀岩課的時候。開始接觸這個運動，就知道要盡量使用腿的力量，避免過份使用手臂的力量，道理很簡單，腿比手強壯地太多。那時，也知道，手臂有機會要盡量打直，不過當初不知道這兩個原則其實是互有聯繫的。

攀岩的時候，大部分都是手臂唉唉告饒，不得以只好打道回府。教練觀察我的動作，跟我說「要相信妳的腿，移多一些重量到腿上去」我常常想牢牢抓住手把處，彎曲著手肘冀望著手臂的力量帶領著身體往上挪動。教練要求我做一個小實驗，先讓雙手攀住離地面大概兩公尺高的手握處，身體自然地垂下，一陣子之後，嘗試彎曲手肘，去體會手臂的受力感覺。原本手臂並沒有感覺到什麼負擔的，改變了手肘的彎曲度之後，手臂馬上累得了不得。

一樣的狀況發生在一次攀爬的時候，右手唯一的著手處，是一個半圓球形的岩石。右手愈想抓得牢牢，愈是感覺無能為力。教練說，手只要輕輕放在上面，身體向另一個方向傾，借重力做工。於是我可以在該處平穩地持續一陣子，在我的手滑出那塊岩石之前，另一隻手已有足夠時間抓住下一個著手處。

我不明白為什麼腦袋會了解這樣，卻叫身體去做別樣。雖說我現在還是常常過份地依賴手臂，我持續提醒自己應該給雙腿多些信心，而雙腿是絕對有資格被託付以重任的。

學習運動是件有趣的事，骨子裡，其實和做科學實驗沒什麼兩樣。我總是樂此不疲的分析，自傲著理性抬頭，但是，腦袋有不足的地方，也會犯錯，而身體常常用他們特殊的表現方式，指出腦袋的錯誤。身體也或許乾脆新開一個處女地，讓尚未全知的腦袋瓜開一下眼界。

不過，我還是一樣喜歡分析，只是不會緊抓著已有的不放，讓身體可以好好給腦袋上一堂課，而到頭來，還是腦袋瓜完成連連看的任務。這也像玩拼圖遊戲一樣，如果已經不能夠在已經拼好的一塊區域上繼續延展了，何不另闢一塊戰場。許許多多的小區域會終究集合在一起，這樣一來，整個過程也快捷順暢地許多。